The Core Characteristic of Emotional Abuse in the Personality Disordered Parent

http://krillco.hubpages.com/hub/The-Core-Characteristic-of-Emotional-Abuse-in-the-Personality-Disordered-Parent

“It is no exaggeration to state that children of a PD parent are considered by that parent to be a possession, or commodity, to be used in the service of the PD parent’s ego. Whereas the average parent instinctively knows that they are responsible to be emotionally supportive to their child so that the child can grow into a healthy adult, the PD parent demands that the child emotionally support, nourish, and protect the parent. Relationship, support, and deference only can go in one direction: from child to parent.”

Today, in addition to the same ole same ole dishes and laundry, I gotta get packed because we are going up to Mackinac Island. Yay! My husband’s friend Kwame was asking, “Why you guys always go up there?” –because it is our place! It one place I can relax and be in the moment. It rejuvenates me up there.

So we are leaving tomorrow God willing, and we have 2 nights at the Grand. Yes, two nights!! My plans are to relax and enjoy the hotel. Unfortunately I have been fighting a nasty cold or some kind of infection. I hope it disappears by tomorrow…or at least is on its way out. I’d like to be able to taste my expensive dinner, ha. I am going to load up on the medications.

I may check out the library if it is open…and I was thinking about going to church on the Island. The Little Stone Church is near the Grand and I may go see how the service is there. I haven’t been to church in a while and I feel like church service on the Island would be an experience.

Yikes! I really gotta get to it. I need to get this house in order (I have like 6-8 loads of laundry to do-YIKES!), pack, then pick up dry cleaning and go to the store. I will probably have to pack for my nephews too–they are going with their dad. I must, absolutely must, work in a nap sometime today also.

Oh yeah, crap! I need to comb the cat, clean or change the litter, clean the bird cage…maybe go to the post office…

UGH!

Can’t wait to get on the Island and chill.

So far, so good; today has been a good day. This week so far…good. I started working more hours at work. I have a set schedule and usually just 4 hours per day. It is nice to get out of the house and away from the monotony of dishes and laundry.I never thought I’d be happy to go to work, haha. It’s McDonalds…

I suppose I am not all that happy when I go but once I am there I am fine. I like the fast pace of it and I work with some very nice people–kids mostly. Most of the customers are pretty nice too. I don’t want to do this forever (and it seems like I have–I have worked there for over 7 years now, yikes! Much more time than I planned…) but I am happy for now. My store manager gave me a thank you card for all I do 🙂 So nice, and very much appreciated. I feel like I should give him one for putting up with me. It has been a rough few years with all my family drama and stuff.

Today it was fairly slow at work so I had to work hard to stay busy. I like to stay busy. As much as I use to think a desk job was the shit (for lack of a better term), I cannot stand sitting around. I like to be on the move. I don’t know what that translates into to as far as a career for me. Physically, I cannot do food service for the rest of my life, or even a lot of being on my feet. I need to get in better shape but still, I am getting older. I guess I just worry. I think about what I want to do in ` the future to make some better money and I have trouble visualizing the perfect job for me. I still want to be a mental health counselor but that is a sit down job…even a college professor is a lot of sitting. IDK…

I get ahead of myself. I keep thinking about the future when I need to concentrate on now. After work today I went shopping. I really didn’t want to–wanted to go home and nap before the boys got home but I had to get a few things from the store. As I did my shopping, I started getting re-energized and I felt my mood lift. I was in the middle of the pasta sauce aisle when I realized I have been going around with a dark cloud over my head–and I don’t rightly know why.At that moment I realized that the cloud was clearing. I think it is because I am getting out of the house every day, not just stewing in my own thoughts. Things aren’t perfect but they aren’t that bad. I feel happy today, and I feel like I can meet my responsibilities.

I got so much to do today, and so much I wanted to get done…but now I don’t feel like doing any of it. First of all, I am tired. So tired. I slept much of the day yesterday. I am wore out.

Second, my day is kind of shot because the boys are home from school. Meningitis scare at the area’s schools closed down the district. Yay.

Third, what I have to do is much of the same old, same old: laundry, dishes. So tired of it all. I am finally caught up in the dishes but I have a few in the sink I need to take care of. Of course there is stuff I have been wanting to get to but never seem to have time for– I need to clean and organize the whole house…plus we have fleas and I need to treat for that. 😦 But I have no energy…and I hate cleaning when people are home.

Fourth, and last, I don’t feel like doing anything but napping–barring that, all I want to do is read articles, do a little writing, and then play The Sims 3 (only I can’t because I have too many browser window open with all the articles I am interested in). Yeah, all I want to do is waste my time. Ugh!!

I need to put these links here so I can read them again later.

Kylie Jenner’s N-Word Controversy: The Problem with White Friends

http://www.thedailybeast.com/articles/2015/09/25/kylie-jenner-s-n-word-controversy-the-problem-with-white-friends.html?source=TDB&via=FB_Page

Two Privileged White Men Arguing Give An Unintentional Lesson On White Privilege

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/two-privileged-white-men-arguing-give-an-unintentional-lesson-on-white-privilege_560434dfe4b00310edfa6418?ncid=fcbklnkushpmg00000063

I have wanted to sign my nephews up for karate since, like, 2012. Finally! I signed them this week and they–we–started last night. It is karate for the whole family so me and my husband got to participate. It was fun but it was a little bit of a work out for someone as out of shape as me. It was a bit too hot yesterday–I’ll have to remember to dress lighter and bring lots of water for everyone. I am glad the boys got out and did something other than playing video games. I wasn’t sure if they would like karate–they did have some trouble paying attention to the instructors–but they all said they liked it, even loved it. I think my husband enjoyed it too. Now if only I could find a swim program or class for the whole family.