File this under advice I could have used a long time ago, hahaha.
An article I came across today:
Dealing with a High Conflict Ex-Wife In 5 Easy Steps: A Guide for Stepmoms
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So much truth…I didn’t have it quite as bad as the author of the article but it was bad enough. And yes I made mistakes, I engaged, I fell into some of the ex’s traps. Ugh. For the most part I had the best motives–my heart was pure: I wanted what was best for my significant other and his son…I wanted them to have time together (without interference from the ex) and a good relationship. I can only guess what the ex’s motives were for being such a cunt. Yes, I said it– she was a (is?) cunt when it came to dealing with her ex-husband (and me).
Much of what the author advocates for dealing with the big, bad ex-wife will work but it is still hard to accept and ultimately it is disatisfying (for the child, for the dad, even for the stepmom). You keep hoping the ex will be reasonable. Why wouldn’t she be? Why can’t she be? Why do so many people excuse this type of behavior in ex-wives (bio-moms)?
It would be so much better for all involved if ex-wives–bio-moms–could put their jealousies and insecurities to rest for the good of their children. Be the mother they claim to be.
Jacquelyn's Space 