That is how I feel lately. I just want it to be me and my husband again– nobody else. I don’t think it is just the usual yearning for hibernation I go through every year around this time. I am just truly sick of doing for others and getting shit on in return. Perhaps I am feeling sorry for myself. Truly, I want to help others but I want to do it on my terms– I am sick of helping others that feel entitled to my help. It seems like anything I do is never enough for people like that (entitled), or I get blamed for them needing help in the first place–like I am the one that fucked up their life, made their poor choices for them, or led them down the wrong path.
It isn’t only that though. I want to get going full force on my dreams and I can’t do it when I am caring for or ‘helping’ others. Not right now. I need to get myself back. I want to concentrate on me and my husband– what we want for our future. I don’t care about the rest…well, I really can’t say that. I just don’t want to care anymore. I have very little left. It is time I start putting myself first, or me and my husband.
Jacquelyn's Space 